New Workplace Words for 2007

Essential vocabulary additions for the workplace (and
elsewhere)!! !

1. BLAMESTORMING : Sitting around in a group,
discussing why a deadline was missed or a project
failed, and who was responsible.

2. SEAGULL MANAGER: A manager, who flies in, makes a
lot of noise, craps on everything, and then leaves.

3. ASSMOSIS: The process by which some people seem to
absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the
boss rather than working hard

4. SALMON DAY : The experience of spending an entire
day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die in
the end.

5. CUBE FARM : An office filled with cubicles.

6. PRAIRIE DOGGING : When someone yells or drops
something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads
pop up over the walls to see what's going on.

7. MOUSE POTATO : The on-line, wired generation's
answer to the couch potato.

8. SITCOMs: Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive
Mortgage. What Yuppies get into when they have
children and one of them stops working to stay home
with the kids.

9. STRESS PUPPY : A person who seems to thrive on
being stressed out and whiny.

10. SWIPEOUT: An ATM or credit card that has been
rendered useless because magnetic strip is worn away
from extensive use.

11. XEROX SUBSIDY : Euphemism for swiping free
photocopies from one's workplace.

12. IRRITAINMENT: Entertainment and media spectacles
that are Annoying but you find yourself unable to stop
watching them.

13. PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE : The fine art of whacking
the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work
again. Often feel like doing this to my computer

14. ADMINISPHERE : The rarefied organizational layers
beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that
fall from the adminisphere are often profoundly
inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were
designed to solve.

15. 404 : Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide
Web error Message "404 Not Found," meaning that the
requested site could not be located.

16. GENERICA : Features of the American landscape that
are exactly the same no matter where one is, such as
fast food joints, strip malls, and subdivisions.

17. OHNO-SECOND : That minuscule fraction of time in
which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake.
(Like after hitting send on an email by mistake).

18. WOOFS : Well-Off Older Folks.

19. CROP DUSTING : Surreptitiously passing gas while
passing through a Cube Farm.